yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
