We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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