are you still at the devil's house?
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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