Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
