question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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