Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
