Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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