I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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