i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
