Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize