He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
