ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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