This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
