FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
