Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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