I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
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