Buhtt sex?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
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