i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
