i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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