Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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