So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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