Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
So much Jack, so little girl.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize