I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize