sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
