So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
