im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
