Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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