found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
