I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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