he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
