She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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