Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
