What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
handjob tips. give me some.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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