Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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