Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
