He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm always down for nudity.
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