he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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