I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
