So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Randomize
