Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
