soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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