You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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