I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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