Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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