Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
