Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
