Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
