Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
