i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
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Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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