I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
She's like a pop up book from hell.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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